We all know spending a few mindless minutes scrolling through social media can make you feel like you’re not enough—not beautiful enough, not thin enough, not successful enough, not a good enough mom or partner or friend. But what if we completely changed the way we used our socials? Instead of just consuming, what if we used them to *actually* connect with people? And instead of competing, what if we cheered each other on instead? Natalie Franke knows how life-giving that shift can be. Natalie is an entrepreneur and founded an organization called the Rising Tide Society, and their highest value is “community over competition.” (Hooray!) Natalie shares about her new book Built to Belong, along with some practical tips to take back your socials, use them to intentionally connect with other people, and bring some life back into your online—and offline—world.
Thanks to our episode sponsor and affiliate partner!
POLICYGENIUS | When it comes to insurance, it’s nice to get it right. Head to https://policygenius.com right now to get started.
GROVE COLLABORATIVE | Fall scents are here, y’all. Spend $20 on your first order, and get a FREE Mrs. Meyers Gift Set! https://emilyley.com/grove
“We don't have to live our lives by measuring ourselves against the highlight reel. We don't have to compete with every single person we see. That's not what we were made for.” — Emily Ley
“These feelings of competition and this emerging comparison, that's only exacerbated by social media. Those flames are fanned immensely by this ever scrolling feed and algorithms. It can take away the really beautiful parts of the community if we let it.” — Natalie Franke
“Vulnerability is an act of opening yourself up to potentially being wounded, right? It's literally removing your armor. My advice is always remove it first in the safest of places.” — Natalie Franke
“Sometimes just hearing, ‘You are not alone,’ those three words can be the most powerful words in the English language when we're going through something.” — Natalie Franke
“We've found a bunch of different studies and one in particular talked about the difference between consuming and connecting on Instagram or social media at large. Those who consumed content had a negative mental health impact.” — Natalie Franke
“We have to learn how to open these applications with intention, such that we're not just there to consume the content. We're there to connect with other human beings. We're there not just to watch others from a distance, but to love people up close.” — Natalie Franke
“I want you to flip the mindset so you're not consumed by how other people are celebrating their moment or their milestone. You are now a member of their team. You're a member of their family. You're now going to cheer for them. Instead of feeling ‘comparisonitis’ come and take over your body, you're going to go, ‘No, no, no, no, no. When that mom wins, I win.”— Natalie Franke
“We are all created uniquely with a different purpose. And when we can start to celebrate one another in their giftings, our giftings, it enables us to really fan the flames not of comparison, but of compassion, of empathy, of kindness, and of joy.” — Natalie Franke
“I think the biggest takeaway I've had from all of this is that we belong to one another. That we may be inspired to pursue our own goals and our own dreams and to dive into individualism with passion and abandon. And yet at the end of the day, we are all still deeply connected.” — Natalie Franke
A Blessing for Your Week
I hope you remember that heart is always more important than hustle.
I hope you see that you can walk farther together and with more joy than going it alone.
And above all, I hope you remember to open your heart enough to be vulnerable, because there are great rewards on the other side of being known.
Simplicity Tip of the Week
It’s hard to compete with someone when you’re vulnerable with them—and that’s especially true when you tell them how much you admire what they do. This week, think about the people you follow on Instagram and single out someone you admire. Maybe they’re an influencer you love to follow, or someone in your real life who’s killing it at her job, or advocating for a worthy cause, or taking good care of her family or herself. Reach out and send her a DM this week, and tell her how much you admire what she’s doing and how she’s sharing it with the world. Trust me, you'll make her day as well as your own.
Build a Life You Love!
Get Emily’s latest book, Growing Boldly: Dare to Build a Life You Love, wherever you buy books!
Resources, Links, Mentions from This Episode
Subscribe to The Simplified Podcast!
Let’s Be Friends!