Making Fewer Decisions, Creating More Calm
Between what to celebrate, who to celebrate with, when to celebrate, which gifts to buy—there's an infinite number of decisions you have to make in a given day. And that's just the special occasions. We still have to make all the regularly scheduled decisions, like what to eat for lunch, when the dog needs his shots, and whether you really need those clear bins for your closet. Kendra Adachi of the Lazy Genius is an absolute pro at this.
Do you ever look up and think, "I wish someone else would just decide what we're having for dinner"? When you have a million logistics swirling and not much time to think, here's what's going to save your life: this simple phrase, "decide once."
It's deceptively simple yet profound. When I hear "decide once," what I really hear is "I'm making this decision now so I don't have to make it again." You're taking this decision completely off the table for the time being because you've already decided what you're going to do in this scenario.
What Decide Once Looks Like in Real Life
The decide once principle could mean that for as long as you choose, you're having crockpot meal Mondays because your bandwidth for meal prep on Mondays is exactly zero. Maybe it means creating a specific place on the counter where you always put the mail. Or keeping string cheese and fruit in the fridge for after-school snacks without having to think about it.
Maybe it means that while your kids are little, you're spending vacations at the beach instead of the mountains because they're happier playing in sand and water than hiking. You're recognizing what's hard about your current season and planning certain life logistics ahead of time so your brain doesn't have to work so hard.
Choosing what to have for dinner isn't hard in isolation. But when it's one choice in what feels like a fire hose of choices coming your way, it can feel paralyzing to make any choices at all. That's when I want to shut down, hide in my closet, order pizza, and think about zero things.
How to Start Deciding Once
The beauty of this approach is you can apply it to any area of life. Maybe you decide once about your Monday uniform—always wearing the same type of outfit so you don't stand in front of your closet wondering what to wear. Or you decide once that the first Monday of each month is when your group meets, so you're not blowing up the group text every week trying to coordinate.
Start by identifying your most decision-heavy moments. When do you feel stretched too thin? What choices drain your energy most? These are prime candidates for the decide once treatment.
You can create lovely limitations in your life this way. When you decide what matters to you, the things you'll be intentional about will be different than someone else's list. Your genius areas and your lazy areas are uniquely yours—and that's exactly how it should be.
Building Decide Once Into Your Weekly Planning
A solid planner routine makes the decide once strategy even more powerful. When you sit down for weekly planning, you can batch similar decisions together. Plan all your meals at once. Schedule recurring activities on the same day each week. Create templates for repeated tasks.
This approach to staying organized as a busy mom isn't about perfection—it's about caring for your future self by taking decisions off her plate. When you build these systems into your life, all the little things add up to one big stress reliever.
Some seasons will be busier than others, and that's just life. But when you see the busy season coming, you can sidestep the decision fire hose before it happens. Make decisions ahead of time that'll help you move through those busy moments with more calm.
Remember: you're being kind to yourself by implementing decide once. And when your people see the way you're caring for yourself, they realize they can be kind to themselves too. The cycle of caring you create continues throughout your entire year.
