Simplifying 2020: Part 4 - Heart
December 31, 2019
I saved this topic for last because it feels the most foundational and the most important. For too many years I sacrificed myself on the altar of motherhood and entrepreneurship. It felt like the obvious good thing to do—pouring out until I had nothing left. But empty isn’t a good feeling. And it’s hard to be a loving, patient mom when you’re empty. Or a caring, thoughtful wife. Or a good leader. I thought pouring out until I was empty meant I was doing it right. If I gave until I had no more, I’d given enough. Why did I do that? I operated out of fear that I wasn’t doing my best, that I could do more, that I could do better. When in reality, living that way sabotaged my efforts. It’s like what they tell you on the airplane: Put your oxygen mask on before putting your child’s on. Sounds crazy. But you can’t give your child oxygen if you don’t have any yourself.
A real, true fresh start begins in your heart. It starts with the desire to live a different way and continues through the consistent, unselfish act of filling up. Giving yourself the gifts of rest, nourishment, wellness, truth, and connection are the most important things you can do when embarking on a transformation or transition. You deserve the fresh start you’re after—so does your family. But you can’t do it if you’re running on empty.
For a little while, I wanted a different title for my new book, When Less Becomes More. In the end, we kept this one because we fell in love with how the less is more philosophy played out in so many different ways throughout the book.
But I’m going to share with you that other title I fell in love with, in hopes that as you embrace less to discover so much more in your life, you transform from Empty to Full.
The emptiness that comes from an overfull life is devastating—but we can halt the epidemic of burnout happening to women today if we identify it, address it, and vow to move on from it in every way we can. You deserve a year of all that is sweet and slow. You deserve the good fullness that comes from a home that provides rest and fuel, routines that provide comfort and cadence, a schedule that is intentional and adequately spaced, and a heart that is full of all that really matters. Life is going to happen in 2020. We’ll lose people we love. We’ll face hard things. We’ll find peace and then it’ll all unravel again. Some of those things are unavoidable. But setting yourself up for renewal and establishing these cornerstones of simplicity will allow you to navigate what’s inevitably ahead with grace and from a place of wholeness.
Wishing you and yours a magical 2020.
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